Haircut?

I really want a haircut.

In a perfect world, I would look fabulous with a pixie cut... but no such luck.
The funny and slightly sad thing is that ever since I can remember, even when I was in elementary school, I've always wanted to get a pixie cut. Like, super short. This might stem from when I once actually had a pixie cut, before it grew out. It was in kindergarten and 1st grade, and everyone mistook me for a boy. I loved it. Classmates would come from behind and ask, "Mitch?" and then I'd turn around frowning and they'd say, "Whoops! Sorry! Never mind, Genevieve!" and I acted frustrated but it was all a show. Maybe, with my child's logic, I was trying to challenge gender stereotypes. And maybe not. Maybe I just liked that short hair took two minutes to wash, as opposed to the ten or so I spend on it now; maybe I liked it when all I had to do was ruffle my hair and be done with it in the morning, without any fuss with brushes and tangles; and maybe all of these reasons stem from laziness.

The point is, none of that matters because I'm not getting a pixie. My hair length will never go above my chin, and at this point the outlook is that it will be somewhere at or slightly above my collarbone.

BUT.

One day I will definitely get a pixie, and when that day comes I will go into exile until it grows to a length that society deems appropriate. In the meantime, I'd love every second of those gloriously short showers.

better the devil you know...

This statement is false (sometimes?).

Someone told me once -(forget who, forget when, forget if I was actually told this or read it in a book or what)- that we hate most in others that which we find is our own weakness. For example- Personally, I used to (and probably still do) have a slight tendency to depend on other people. I can sometimes brush it off as a trust issue (as in I trust too much), but other times I just become annoying and burdensome to my friends. So when I met my (now friend) Kristy, I wasn't too keen on her. She was, in my perspective, always trotting along behind us, as if she were a stray puppy that needed someone to take care of her. She always wanted to hang out, to talk, to go do something. Thus, I recognized my own weakness in her, and disdained her for it.
I've gotten over that particular hurdle, seeing as how we're friends now, but still.

The reason I'm bringing this up is because I'm trying to figure out what's going wrong here in the dorm. Recently I've been having issues with some of the girls, and I've been wallowing in it for a while now trying to figure it out. Now I'm thinking, maybe the above situation is the case. The more it sits in my head, the more reasonable it starts looking. One of the girls tends to be lazy- check for myself. Another has a problem with authority/ being bossed around- check. There's a girl who I manage to get along with most of the time, except when she's being a hermit and sequestering herself with manga and music and forgetting about the outside world- check. Yet another tends to be forgetful, flighty, and wears herself out trying to help people without dealing with her own crap- check check check.

SO basically, I have to get over myself and just learn to deal with it.
Bite the bullet, grin and bear it, take one for the team, keep on keeping on, etc.
Also I have to work on my own personal problems, and better myself or whatever.
Aaaauuuuugh.


ALSO,
PS,
this site is pretty fantastic.
Especially if you're someone like me who has trouble winding down when it's time for bed.