happy birthday Michael

Turns out the froyo place is only going to be able to give me two days a week, and my boss lady is kinda... Well. I've only worked with her twice, but I don't know. She doesn't seem like someone I could be friendly with? If that makes sense. I don't want to say anything bad about her because I don't know her very well, but she said a few things that just made me question her thought processes.

ANYWAYS.

My younger sister has a job again, and we're pretty sure that she won't get fired from this one because they're paying around $9 an hour and that's a lot, considering that she'll be working 40 hours a week (four 10 hour shifts) (all of those hours... folding clothes) (except breaks).

This was also supposed to be a post about feelings, but I think I'll just avoid that entirely because I haven't really decided how I want to go about all this. This stuff.

So I left my sketchbook in Tennessee last month? Two months ago? It seems like forever, because I haven't had my sketchbook and I swear that thing is like a horcrux, it is a piece of my soul.
And I finally got it back the other day!
Yay!
Like really, I'm getting warm fuzzies just thinking of it.
I love my sketchbooks.

Also-
I made chess pie today from this recipe, which is actually not good because I am kinda stupid sometimes when it comes to baking and this recipe only gave me the ingredients, oven temp, and amount of time it takes to bake! I mean, okay, those are all important things that I'd love to know, but I failed at getting the crust in the pan, I'm thinking I probably needed to chill it? Anyways. It still turned out pretty good, not as moist as I thought it'd be so I'll do something different with it next time, but still pretty tasty.

Next time I bake I'm going to try smores cookies and/ or apple pie cookies.
SO DELICIOUS LOOKING, OM NOM NOM.

Okay, that's all, I'll talk about music and my sketchbook some more next time. Maybe. I don't know, whatever, I really need to sleep.


PS I love my little brother.

VICTORY YESSSSSSSSSS

The major concern that has been monopolizing my thoughts recently has been a disquieting lack of money. I have a part time job already, but I really needed another job so that I could start putting money away and NOW I HAVE ONE YES.
I went out with some friends yesterday, and we stopped by a frozen yogurt place nearby and there was a sign saying that they were hiring, so I asked for an application and it turns out that both of the owners were there (husband & wife team, adorable!) and so I filled out the application while we were eating. They interviewed me there in the restaurant not long after I gave them the application, and today they called me back and told me that I could start training as soon as I was available! Which is Friday morning! YES YES YES YES, my brain is just a riot of relief and YES.





I actually doodled this as we worked out a tentative training schedule. Hehehe.

This job won't solve all my problems, but it's a step in the right direction.

hahaaaa... ha.

I just really thought about it, and one of the things I miss most about working in Arizona is... Ethan! My boss/friend's baby! Oh gosh, he is just the cutest thing. I would spend time in the office even when I wasn't working, so that I could play with him. Making him laugh was a favorite pastime of mine. It was just so uplifting!
When I first arrived in August, he was about a month old. I remember when he started being able to focus on things, and following people with his eyes, and reacting to things! The first time I heard him laugh, I remembered that line that faeries were made from a baby's laugh. Something like that, right? Well, it was just like that.
And when she brought him to Ohio for his birthday, to see his grandparents, he recognized me! I was sitting a few pews behind them, and I waved to him, and he smiled! So adorable. Oh, I miss him so much! I miss his mother too, of course. She was my only friend there, which is partially due to my crippling social anxiety when it comes to things like that, but still.

I just had to get that out of my system.
Gosh, babies are cute.

Oh, also! Good news!

MY OLDER SISTER IS PREGNANT!
AAHHH!

I had a dream that she had a gorgeous baby girl, and she was so adorable that the faeries came and left a changeling boy in her place. Everyone thought it was a miracle of science, but I knew better! I woke up thinking of every old wives' tale to prevent faeries from stealing babies. The sad part of that is that I know quite a few. What can I say, my family really likes folklore...

smile! OR ELSE

Normally I have some pretty great dreams, but lately I've been having really bad ones and they tend to follow me around all day afterwards.
Like last night I had a dream that I was working undercover as the assistant to this psycho sadistic lady who kidnaps people and makes them her slaves, and my team & I were caught (which was horrible in and of itself). Then I managed to escape after one of her "visits" to the place where she kept us, and I hitchhiked to the closest town (we were in Mexico?) and prepared as much as I could to go back and free everyone else. So I go back, get in, and I've opened the door & I'm about to go out & she's standing there, waiting for me! And to get back at me she starts mentally torturing this other girl I don't even know, and it's just awful, so I start begging and crying and making up perfectly reasonable excuses as to why I left, such as "I was just so hungry, I needed food, I needed to see trees and talk to people who aren't mentally broken" etc. etc. and so on. I was one of her "favorites", so she started to believe me a little and I wrapped myself around the crying girl and started rocking her, saying "It's alright, she won't hurt you anymore, I'm here, I'll protect you, it's alright, sshhhhh," and I was crying because I was still begging psycho lady to "Stop, please stop, don't hurt her because of me, please stop!"

I woke up almost crying.




SO THEN I DREW THIS.
Because I need to not have bad dreams anymore.

(sadstuck fanart)

I just have this headcanon that Aradia makes a few rounds among the dream bubbles and sort of... Comforts the other trolls? Except she doesn't really say things like, "It'll be alright," or anything like that, but she'll be very honest and maybe just say things like "What's done is done, there's nothing we can do to change it now, might as well let go." Or something like this scene.
Vriska just gives me so many feelings.



PS, I LIED, I HAVEN'T DRAWN A SINGLE HAND, FIGHT ME.

nada nada, limonada

As a general rule, I learn basic rules and information quickly. How to bake cookies, or work the register, the names of most of the bones in the human body. But really, I'm just good at memorizing things. When it comes down to things like, "Genevieve, how do you feel about this sudden development of complicated events happening?" I just sort of throw my mental hands in the air (sometimes my physical hands too). Really, I am like molasses in that respect.
There's really no point in me blogging about this, since I'm pretty sure my friends were aware of this before I was, except that I'm really frustrated with what's going on in my life right now and I don't really want to talk about it because I still have no idea what's going on because it's taking me forever to pick things apart thoroughly and figure everything out.



SO HAVE A PAGE OF THUMBNAIL SKETCHES.

I'm actually kinda proud of these? Because I've decided to take everything that I'm not good at, art-wise, and then focus on it until I am at a semi-passable skill level. Next up is hands.

(new mantra)

Okay, so I have this thing where I get songs stuck in my head. That's normal. But without fail, the songs somehow reflect what's going on- how I'm feeling, what I'm thinking, the situation that I'm in, etc. I don't even realize what I'm thinking/ feeling until the song pops into my head, sometimes. It's uncanny, and I feel as if my subconscious has started to communicate via music and lyrics.
Which is funny now that I think about the dream I had a month or so ago, where I was singing "Dancing Queen". Hahaha!
But that's slightly different.

ANYWAYS.

I really love this song, and it's been stuck in my head since I heard it the other day.

Also, I feel a little guilty? because I haven't uploaded any sketches for a while, and I really want to do it just for myself but my sketchbook got left behind in GA/TN and our scanner isn't working so I am left with a small collection of old things I never posted.




This sketch, as you may be able to see, is dated from the 1st of April. I was yearning for winter and snow after months of Southwest living, but... Yeah. I settled for a cute doodle.